Things I Learned at the Spa

by Bianca

Yesterday Avon had this perfect initiative to send a few of us to the spa and it was pretty great. I had a massage booked at 7:30PM, planned my whole day around it, so that nothing would go wrong. Right? No, not really.

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Here’s the thing: I can’t behave at the spa.

Because of an emergency photo shoot, things got delayed, so I ran home from work, changed, moved the spa appointment, thanked the gods of forgiveness for granting me nice people that don’t mind in my life, did the shoot, ran back home, changed, jumped in a cab and arrived at the spa.

Darling, you’re not suppose to come to the spa in a rush. That was Lesson I. Because when you get there in a rush, you’ll look just like that: loud, a bit stressed out, hair a mess. And of course everyone is there in perfect make-up and white robes, wondering what you are doing there.

Lesson II: Don’t be loud, everyone’s chilling.

Lesson III: Don’t be too quiet, you’re expected to socialize. Instagram doesn’t count, realifegram girls, realifegram! Tips for conversation: Angelina’s life choices, Cannes, Great Gatsby, diets, juices, spa treatments. You welcome.

Lesson IV: Don’t go in the men’s sauna. Apparently it’s frowned upon.

Lesson V: Bring make-up remover, for the love of all that’s holy, so that you don’t have the feeling that no matter how much you exfoliate in the shower, your make-up will never leave your pores.

Lesson VI
: Massage is nice, I like massage. I would like massage daily. Thank you.

I certainly hope that next time I’ll look like one of those posh ladies that come into the spa and you wonder what in the world she’s doing there, she’s already perfect. Until then, I’ll try not to be late, not have any emergencies and turn off my phone every once in a while. It reminds me that being quiet for 10 minutes is food for the soul.

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BEFORE: Here is a picture of me shortly after arriving at the spa. See what I’m doing wrong? I’m Instagram-ing (5 points from Gryffindor) and selfie-ing (50 points!)

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AFTER: White clad and quiet, but not too quiet. Taaaaah-daaaah!